Well I wasn't gonna post till like wednesday when something special happens but I just couldn't resist… Well friday I really did get a shock I walked in and rich say "Emma wants a word with you" I'm like me… why me.. seemed shelly still has feelings for me and wanted to talk… my face litery looked like this:

[REMOVED]

Ok well not that bad but still I was shocked. So the day carried on as normal then I got a email from shelly which hardcore replied with "I love you" true but im not a person to blurt that out Well I emailed back we got talking, then we met up talked some more sorted out some bits and more talking. We hugged each other it felt so right then her bf walked in well shelly was gonna end it with him anyway so I had nothing to worry about.

Alot of people won't agree with what I have done, but its my life I am only young, I am gonna give her one more chance but I believe that me and her are ment for each other. We still had feelings for each other whats the point in hidding them?

Well thats about all thats happened oh I got my tire sorted of course my nan had to get involved and make things worst "oh you need to put some air in all the tire" and she kept windging so I though "hey I can't see what the harm will be in that". So i got the pump out got it all going had my radio on etc, pump started to stutter and then died.

Wierd when to start car up.. dead. Battery had gone flat from the pump and radio typical! oh dear it starts to rain and I have a window open… electric windows… cant shut them… NOOOOO! So I had to go find something to cover the window with "wheres all the polythene? Ok i'll just use cardboard" it did the job…

Battery on charge for about a hour give it enough juice to start and close window so I cheered up after that but that cars all muddy now from the pissing rain. I'll have to clean it and try out this new t cut stuff I got :D. Oh and my car has a name now she is called Alicia lmao.

ok expect next update wednesday thats the big day would spoil the suprise though Some of you already know though

Thanks for reading oh and theres some more suprises in store and a new feature on the way!

- Tom Parker

1 Comment » Posted by Tom Parker / College and Confusion and Emotional and Fun and Love and Random and Rants

These days I never seem to feel very happy anymore i kinda hide it by putting on a smile but deep down its just making things worst i'm also very very angry inside and I dont even know why I don;t like being like this but I can'thelp but think when me n shelly broke up this is what made me like this. So my week so far sucks, I have no real interest in doing any work anymore and I don;t know why well I kinda do when I feel like this it makes me do stuff like this.

You know what would really cheer me up? A nice big hug from my mum no seriously that would really make me feel better and a long chat about alsorts I getting home sick but I dont know why. I never get any of that kinda love from living with my grentz and its the same with my brother everyone just b*tches at each other.

I'm not really enjoying GUI lessons still but I got a shock when the teacher said i'm all upto date I upset dave on msn the other night and its due to my stupid brain and its stupid ideas I can't help it but when some repeats something over and over again its gets into my head that there taking the piss..sure he was only messing but then upping that a stage and picking on my social life just set me off and I said something I regretted.

I hate myself sometimes because how my brain thinks I could just sit here and cry over everything that has happened lately but I won't everyone would take the piss and I just hate that pissing me off at a time like this wouldn't be the best of ideas. F**k my phone battery just died.. GREAT! Sorry guys its just everything is getting to me and i'm snappy.

God knows what this world is coming to I heard this on the radio today…

An independent panel of experts has called for heroin injection rooms - where users could legally inject drugs - to be trialled in the UK.

Whos stupid idea what that? read more about it here Tony blairs I guess.. f**king twat. Its stupid in my view because its condeming people to keep on taking more drugs!

Ooo LOST is on tonight something thats kinda something to look forward too I guess… and I'm meeting up with a old girl school mate tomorrow which will be nice to see her.. I see her about 2 weeks back when I biked to sutton bridge her names kirsty and shes sweet as anything pitty she has a bf.

Ok news just in that a poem i wrote for shelly aaaaaaaaaages ago got accidently printed off today and some wierd person handwrote it and give it to her :S wierd or what ok then well now shes gonna think im stalking her now..great!

- Tom Parker

12 Comments » Posted by Tom Parker / College and Confusion and Emotional and Nan and Random and Rants

…I know you dont like them but I thought you wanted them anyways" Thats what I heard as I sat down for tea tonight. Well first of all I do like them and always have and if I didnt why the hell did she cook them for me? Sometimes I wonder why she isn't in a looney bin!

I went to cook a burger wednesday night she watched me get all out I required 1 plate but thats was too hard I was handed a bread knife…ohhhhh what the hell do I need this for? She admitted to me that she thinks she is losing it so why don't she go do something about it?

College…SUCKS GUI is totally sh*t they aint helping us at all from the start the trimester ask anyone in that class and they will say the same thing, *REMOVED* has no idea what he is doing and this whole assignment we have been given makes f**k all of sence.

Monday got chucked out of lesson for laughing uncontrollably along with rich tev and jim walked out for some odd reason… Wednesday was fun… errrm I went to the post office… oh how fun! I dunno i think i've had enough of college but I gotta keep going GUI is bringing us all down without any help.

I think i'm over shelli now I still miss her now and again but as dave (hardcore) said "shes a bad apple move on" put it down to experience lesson well learnt. Need to find another gf I have alot of love to give lol

I guess about all thats happened nana still continues to drive me up the wall oh and the number 666 keeps popping up infront of me today which is abit wierd and scary too. The weather is cr*p I have nothing to do but b*tch and moan about how "terrible" my life is lol.

Cant wait for spain..

Hi to: All college mates and staff who read this, nat, maria and jade if she read this

- Tom Parker

2 Comments » Posted by Tom Parker / College and Computers and Confusion and Emotional and Nan and Rants

This isn't how its supposed to be them things I said I didn't mean but I had to say them because its away for me to express my anger of being hurt. People who know me proper will know I'm a sensitive person I don't normally talk like that at all unless i've been hurt, my feelings have been pissed about.

However much I get hurt I still care for whoever is hurting me… sounds stupid right? Well it probably is but its how I am. My intention was to break up with you because you was unhappy I was hoping you was going to be happy.. Not get even more misserable then you already were.

Now I got that out the way…
College life is getting better daily totty hunting and getting in with other girls… What already!? Nah it just aint happening kissing other girls jus aint making ti any better for myself infact it makes me feel terrible inside. I'm just not up for it.. its only a matter of time I guess..

Home life.. terrible mini civil war going on yesterday nana wouldn;t let me open the fridge door an extra 15cm's just incase the door come off… Ok… i'll just call up the white van people now… And drop you into a looney bin while we still have time..

Sorry that I aint talked to u on MSN Nat I just posted on my blog thats all

- Tom Parker

2 Comments » Posted by Tom Parker / Confusion and Emotional and Love and Nan and Random and Rants